Thursday, June 5, 2008

Only the Best Intentions

It's amazing the promises we make with the best of intentions that we never really thought we'd keep. I guess we call those New Years Resolutions. Regardless, I've been struck recently with how promises have become so cheapened and how my best intentions never really get my best effort. I always thought to the two should go hand-in-hand.

For example: I have recently made a goal of mine to lose 10 pounds in 6 weeks for a friend's wedding. Luckily, I have a boyfriend who eats health food like it's going out of style, works out on a regular basis, and by simply living his normal life makes me feel guilty for my indulgences. It makes the weight loss thing a little easier. Not to mention the Doctor-prescribed 2-3 mile run everyday..which is a story for another day. Whether or not I meet this goal, I'm glad I feel healthier trying.

Let's be honest: as excited as I was to run 2 miles (all running!) for the first time after years of apparently half-effort...as soon as the boyfriend left town I'm noticing that I would MUCH rather revert back to my old eating habits and the joys of sitting on my couch reading and tv watching. I guess I shouldn't find that quite so shocking, but shouldn't I be at a point where my own health and well-being is enough to inspire me to take care of me regardless of who's watching?

Example 2 (yes, we are heading toward the slippery slope of too long an entry...get over it): A friend of mine is reading a book about humanity's inability genetically to stay faithful. Women who have affairs are more likely to get pregnant because the person they are having an affair with is more likely to be a top-rung competitor in the race for the survival of the fittest. Her body wants to have the spawn of the icky guy. How weird is it that we are not even biologically set to fulfill our promise to love and cherish until the end of time. It terrifies me to think that someday my wedding vows could just be made with the best of intentions and a lack of true effort...on either part. Good luck to the poor sap ridiculous enough to put a ring on my somewhat crooked, knuckle-lacking left 4th digit. No wonder so many women are crazy.

And so I am led to believe, as I often am during such times when I allow my insanity to run a little more rampant than usual, that perhaps my relationship with Christ merely receives my best of intentions with a lack of true effort. Of course I meant it when I asked for forgiveness for that sin, and of course I didn't want to make that same mistake twice...but alas, here I am again in the same old miry clay I find myself in every so often when my intentions and my efforts don't seem to match up.

I know that we toot our horns as Christians telling the world that Christianity is not about the motions, it's about a relationship...which I absolutely agree with. My relationship with Christ is what makes me Christian, not my ability to go through the motions. However, I would counter that my willingness to go through the motions is the first of many efforts that I often overlook. The "motions" as we call them, are the exact things that are meant to remind me of how much my relationship with Christ means to me...and how much I mean to Him. Sure, I'm not saved by reading my Bible regularly, going to church every chance I get, helping out with the kid's program, praying constantly, and witnessing...but it sure does take my relationship with Christ from one of intention to one of effort. And all that effort gives that relationship meaning.

We can't expect to take the step of a commitment with only intentions to carry us through. As any married couple can attest, it's the effort that keeps the relationship afloat. Every once in awhile, someone has to give a little. Seeing as how Christ already did the whole coming to Earth to save my soul by dying on a cross and paying the price for the sins I still commit thing...I figure it's probably my turn to give a little. Christ has already made the effort to keep his commitment to your relationship. Now it's your turn to decide if that commitment you made in return was just made with the best of intentions, or will you also give it your best effort?

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